Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
