Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
