I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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