I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
