Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I AM VODKA MAN
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
