When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
