Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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