my mouth tastes like poor choices
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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