My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
