So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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