apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
We got so high we made milksteak
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
