The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
