I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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