either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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