I wish they made helmets for livers.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize