thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
