The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
