Why are handjobs necessary in class?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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