Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
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I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
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my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold