I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
