turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
