God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Randomize