Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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