with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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