I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
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