i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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