Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
