Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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