I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize