so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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