I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
