I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
