I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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