Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
