if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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