Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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