Your tits are I can't wait for
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
