Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
