What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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