I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
