I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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