That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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