i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
