I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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