moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize