Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
