I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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