Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
