Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
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