OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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